I am so happy to have finished the paintings of Eric and me. Here they are (although poorly photographed):
There is something that I have been wanting to talk about for a couple of weeks, and it seems as if now is the best chance I’ll get. I say this because these paintings depict something that I have been thinking about constantly since starting them last November. Before you get worked up, let me say that I am not pregnant. In fact, this month marks one year since we started trying to get pregnant and there is no end in sight. I felt the need to tell you this, because I know that there are a lot of women out there who are in this situation as well. (You know you are one if your trash cans are filled with negative pregnancy tests and ovulation predictors, you keep a thermometer next to your bed, you get choked up when talking about getting pregnant, you cry when you get your period, you try any silly thing you think could increase your chances of getting pregnant (I think I’ll try Mucinex before ovulation next), you find yourself online shopping for baby clothes even if you’re not going to buy anything…the list goes on.) It is such a sad existence, but if you’re going through it I want you to know that you are not on your own.
If you can relate to this post, feel free to email me at firstname.lastname@example.org and tell me a little about yourself. Almost everyone knows someone who is pregnant, but it’s a lot harder to find those who have struggled or are struggling to get pregnant even though there are many. It is an even more difficult thing to face when you feel like you’re the only one.
If you have a friend who is trying to get pregnant and you don’t know what to say to her, just tell her that you’re praying (but only if you really are), or that you are sorry and you are there for her. Please be sensitive and try to put yourself in her shoes. Comments like “Are you pregnant?” or “You look pregnant” often give false hope or rub salt on a wound. And, unless you struggle(d) with the same thing, tread very carefully when giving advice. “It’s in God’s timing” is something that a lot of people say to me. Although it is true and it is a nice reminder, it makes me want to say “Believe me, I know better than anyone. It’s certainly not my timing!” Also things like “It will happen soon” or “before you know it” are pretty hard to hear. “Soon” and “Before I know it” came and went long ago.
And lastly, if you are pregnant, I hope you can always remember what an amazing gift you’ve been given. Never take it for granted.